Why Self-Help Makes You Miserable | Dr. Rick Hanson, Being Well

@RickHanson and I discuss what’s wrong with the self-help industry.

We explore the industry’s mixed-bag focus on individual responsibility, the risks of turning healing into a never-ending project, performative personal growth, narcissism, social media and capitalism, and honest striving vs. hustle culture. We also talk about our personal experiences navigating our relationship to the industry. Throughout, we emphasize finding the middle path: balancing agency with awareness, growth with acceptance, and sincerity with skepticism.

Key Topics:
0:00 Introduction
4:32 Healthy striving vs. obsessive self-improvement
8:27 The role of motivation: growth, shame, and self-worth
12:13 Problems with placing all responsibility on the individual
20:46 Performative self-help and spiritual status-seeking
26:13 Excessive self-preoccupation and narcissistic drift
34:34 Buddhist insights on “selfing” and the illusion of identity
44:43 Self-help as hustle culture
50:57 The generational shift from grindset to bed rotting
54:09 The self-help industrial complex and its incentives
58:56 Commodifying the self and seeking validation
1:04:18 Creating ethical, transparent content
1:08:12 Recap

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Who Am I: I’m Forrest, the co-author of Resilient (https://amzn.to/3iXLerD) and host of the Being Well Podcast (https://apple.co/38ufGG0). I’m making videos focused on simplifying psychology, mental health, and personal growth.

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I’m not a clinician, and what I say on this channel should not be taken as medical advice.

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